Sometimes life just coasts along, some things change but they are small and hardly noticed and don’t seem to disrupt a thing. Things are comfortable, safe and predictable like a well broken in pair of jeans BUT sometimes a slightly less comfy new pair of jeans gives you some extra swagger in your step and THAT is what I am trying to remember.
Aside from the small detail of becoming parents our life for the past couple of years has been chugging along smoothly, my hubby with a decent and steady job at a local mill (the reason we relocated here), me enjoying my year of mat leave and expecting to return to work full time (a bit begrudgingly of course), we bought a house, upgraded a vehicle and were relatively comfortable with most aspects of our life.
Then all of a sudden … SO. MUCH. CHANGE.
The hubby gets a lay-off notice.
I am told my position at the bank has been eliminated but they will probably have something for me at one of the two branches on the coast… Or they will have a severance package for me. Nbd.
My chronic procrastinator self actually starts looking for childcare and realizes there might be one option that will take our little guy and by the time we pay childcare more of my income will be going to that than I will bring home… I had been assuming that I would just simply go back to work and even though the thought of being away from our son broke my heart I was kind of just thinking that was the only option. Eyes. Opened.
Change is stressful, even good change. But it is also so good to shake things up sometimes and that is what I have learned in the past few months as we have navigated all of this (and still are navigating). We are fortunate that my husband has a trade and is taking the leap to self-employment. He just finished his first week working for himself and although that comes with its own set of headaches I think it will be more fulfilling In the long run. I am going back to work just two days each week and then providing a bit of childcare myself, as well as blogging!
So in short we have a lot of learning, adjusting, moving on and scheduling to do. Some days I forgot we even had anything to worry about but then some nights I couldn’t sleep because I was going over all the “what ifs” in my mind. Over and over. And over.
Here are a few things that helped and is helping me keep my head:
- Focus on the things that aren’t changing. It was comforting to know that no matter what happened with our jobs and potentially location I still had my little family and that gives me the warm fuzzies.
- If you are having trouble sleeping, instead of going on your phone (my usual go to) because it really doesn’t help at all, physically write it out. Put your thoughts on paper, it somehow eases your burden a bit. Or wake up your soundly sleeping husband and make him listen to you ;) which brings me to my next point…
- Communicate. I will admit when something is bothering or weighing on me I find it difficult to communicate about it and things usually come to a boiling point internally which rarely ends well. When my hubby and I really started communicating I felt so much better knowing we were on the same page.
- Take care of yourself, nothing makes stress worse than lack of sleep, junk food, and lack of exercise. I am guilty of all three but focusing on making healthy choices will make you feel better physically and mentally.
- Use your support system – talk to friends and family, be social, do your thing. It can be easy to get trapped inside your own head and in your own scary little world but your problems won’t seem nearly as bad if you have other things going on in your life.
Stay positive, do what you can with what you can control, don’t push away those that want to offer support. There’s nothing like a big shove out of your comfort zone to shake things up and give a new perspective. So much has changed in our lives and the future is now (way more) unsure and I think that could mean it will be better way than I ever could have expected!
What other ideas do you have for coping with change? Comment & share below if you found this helpful!